When to Move From Independent to Assisted Living

Independent Living vs. Assisted Living

Independent Living

“Independent living” — as opposed to an older adult living on their own — is a term applied to older adults who live in a retirement community. In independent living communities, people over 55 live among their peers and do not require assistance with daily tasks such as bathing, dressing, and medication administration. There is usually a communal dining room with restaurant-style meals, along with a host of on-site amenities such as housekeeping, laundry and linen service, a hair salon and barber shop, fitness facilities, a pool, exercise classes, movies, lectures, and off-site excursions. You may also find book clubs, gardening clubs, art clubs, and other organizations.

Assisted Living

Assisted living is designed for older adults who need support with activities of daily living (ADLs) or medication management. Residents still maintain a certain level of independence. Assisted living residents typically live in apartments and are able to manage some things on their own. The communities provide less support than a skilled nursing or memory care facility. Like independent living, the communities typically offer a variety of amenities and enrichment activities. By law, they also have 24/7 staff available, but overnight and weekend staff may vary from facility to facility. The employees may include home health aides, certified nursing assistants, registered nurses, and licensed practical nurses.

Signs It’s Time to Move From Independent to Assisted Living

Around half of assisted living residents are aged 85 or older, but some enter as early as age 65. Many factors can determine when assisted living is the right step. It is important to note that these changes can occur whether your loved one is still in their own home or has entered an independent living community. Below is a list of questions to ask that can help determine if it’s time to make the transition.

• Does your loved one have challenges with bathing, dressing, toileting, cooking, mobility, routinely taking medication, or accomplishing necessary tasks such as housekeeping and food shopping?
• Are there uncharacteristic changes in disposition, attitude, mood, or energy, including depression or lethargy?
• Has there been a change in personal hygiene?
• Are they losing weight by not eating enough? Is there consistently uneaten, moldy food in the refrigerator?
• Have there been recent falls or an increasing number of falls?
• Has there been a personal health scare or life-altering event, such as the progression of an illness or death of a spouse?
• Are finances no longer being attended to?

Any one of those issues could signal the need to start a conversation about assisted living. Just remember that everyone’s needs and circumstances are different. It’s best to take some time to consider these questions and what they mean for your loved one.

How to Start the Conversation

Some seniors are relieved at the idea of assisted living, where they will no longer have to struggle through their days. For others it’s a difficult subject. Leaving behind the home they’ve lived in for decades or an independent living community where they’re comfortable can be nostalgic, stressful, and fear-inducing. Experts generally agree that the earlier you start the conversation, the more time your loved one will have to adjust.

Sometimes an abrupt, life-changing situation can kick-start the conversation. Regardless of the circumstances, kindness and empathy are key to effective communication. It’s important to make sure your loved one knows their decision-making power is not being undermined. They are a valued participant in the conversation about the direction their life needs to take.

Your loved one needs to feel that it is a collaborative decision — and it is. Unless you obtain guardianship, a lengthy and difficult process at best, you cannot force a loved one to leave their home. Some people mistakenly believe being designated as a power of attorney gives them that authority, but that’s not the case. The documents only give someone the power to be the senior’s (or otherwise impaired person’s) voice for legal, financial, or health matters.1

Tips for Making the Transition to Assisted Living Easier

Transitioning to assisted living can be challenging. Luckily, there are plenty of ways to make the move easier. Check out our tips below.

• Approach the conversation with your loved one with empathy, active listening, and patience. Those qualities are critical for addressing any fears, concerns, and anxieties your loved one may experience. Validate your loved one by acknowledging that their feelings are real.
• Downsizing is imminent since assisted living apartments are usually smaller spaces, but many older adults feel better about leaving their home knowing they can take familiar items with them. That may include family photographs, mementos, furnishings, books, plants, comforters, and artwork. All those items are ties to a full life. There is no need to leave that life completely behind even though circumstances have changed.
• Visiting multiple communities together can serve many purposes. You can meet the staff, tour the facility, and ask important questions about costs and care. Visiting a facility in person can make everyone — particularly your loved one — feel more assured about the next step.
• If there are other family members your loved one feels comfortable with, it may be a good idea to involve them in the conversation. Don’t do that, however, if your loved one will feel overwhelmed or outnumbered. Including a trusted clergy member or doctor may also be helpful for facilitating open communication.

Cost of Independent vs. Assisted Living

Independent and assisted living costs vary from state to state. The following information is important to note when deciding if assisted living is right for your loved one.

Independent Living

Many variables impact the cost of an independent living community, including the size of the community, the type of housing — a single-family home, townhome, apartment, or condo — and number of bedrooms. Other factors include optional services, amenities, and fees for utilities, such as laundry, maintenance, landscaping, cable, internet, and phone.2

Some independent living communities require you to purchase rather than rent a home, which requires you to pay for homeowners insurance and property taxes. If that’s not the case, there are renters insurance costs to consider.

Assisted Living

Assisted living typically costs more per month than an independent retirement community because of the care provided. Costs will vary by the type of housing, level of care, amenities, additional fees for utilities or services, and location.

The estimated median cost of assisted living in 2024 is $4,917 per month, according to Genworth.4 Assisted living costs are expected to rise each year, along with other popular senior living and care options. Room and board is not typically covered by Original Medicare or Medicaid, but those insurance programs may cover some costs related to medical care provided in the assisted living community.

>> Related Reading: Is Assisted Living Tax Deductible?

How to Find Assisted Living Near Me

When searching for a doctor, dentist, or other health-care professional, networking among friends, family, and trusted health experts often yields the best results. There is nothing like a personal recommendation from someone close to us with direct experience!

The same goes for finding an assisted living community. Reach out to people you know, and then carefully research and visit each recommended community to gather all the facts. Our senior living directory provides years of state-by-state research and other up-to-date information to help you and your loved one make the best choice for the next phase of life.